Discernment

And tell me, dear,
 Did you think of me when you tucked her hair?
 Did you do that just for show or this time did you actually care??

You held my hand,
Pulled me up and shared your shoulder in the grief,
Just to push me from the cliff.
I felt as if,
The world crumbled, and I was slipping under the debris,
All stiff.

You asked me why I was hiding from the world,
"I'm here now," you reassured.
Did you ever mean every word you said?
Half of them, you might not recall, I bet.
But they haunt my dreams... yet.

Honey, I regret that we met.

I hung up the call,
I knew,
My heart would shatter again, remembering your voice.
You left once; you'll leave again, so I distanced myself.
You left me no choice.

I wish I could say this to your face,
It wasn't attractive when your words chose to abase.
You left with no trace, yet that day I saw your face.
It broke my heart instead of making it race.

I gave you my warmth, knowing
In your canvas,
Your muse, her face,
You still made that your art base.
You still keep her picture in your space.

I knew, I know,
We were beyond all bound.
Still, every time I cross your stop,
I wonder if you're around.

You lied,
Darling, when you claimed you loved me,
Otherwise, hating makes sense, but indifference?