Why I'm never enough??

Shall I rip my heart, 
and place it on your feet? 
Doing so will I be enough 
or your standard will I meet?

Those brown eyes pierces my soul,
like Gothel did her's on an old lore,
Are you doing enough and best, 
or it's just me asking for more?

All that blunt lies of giving everything, 
Then taking the only thing I had, just to fulfill her thirst. 
Does your heart ache when my soul cries, 
or your hand tremble when I want to burst?

And I try to rewrite the past in my head; 
What if I was dead, or 
What if I was never born, 
Rather than brought up and hated. 
Neither did I have to die everyday, 
nor do I have to cry, or just to be faded. 
From your love.....

Have you ever fought so hard all your life to be loved? Not from strangers, not from anyone else but from the piece of soul you were formed from. Have you ever struggled to be seen, to be understand? Have you ever felt you don't belong somewhere you're supposed to be? 

And what yo do when you feel such? Pick a paper and write or confront them? 

I do both and that  rip my soul each time when I have to do so. And it makes me inferior not infront of people but from my own self. Infront of my shadow, my picture in mirror, my thoughts.