trying, trying, trying...

this is me trying

Why?
I feel like I'm the same as before.

Trying something noticeable, 

praiseworthy, 

So they can truly make me feel loved. 

Even if they don't.

I'm seeking from you also, 

something I don't know. 

I'm constantly doing that and it has become a habitual habit.

Because I've always done that. 

From my creator, 

I sought to be seen. 

From friends, 

to be included in. 

From siblings, 

treat me like I'm normal, always been.

So, I sought from you. 

To be understood, always not out of the blue, 

Accept me in every shade of color, 

in whatever hue, 

Hug me till all my pain spills out, 

so I can finally be true.